Tag: hiking

A Perfect Place For A Time-out

I spent this afternoon warding off a wicked headache while doing my best to relish in the final moments of my weekend “time-out”.

But when you live with Depression and Anxiety, often the simplest things or the simplest tasks feel way too overwhelming. 

Most of the things I plan for in my week honestly never get done, even the ones which bring me joy. 

Whether it be preparing a meal for my family, doing a load of laundry, a coffee break with a friend (I don’t actually drink coffee though) or making a quick trip to the grocery store has me crippled with fear. 

I become paralyzed.

Frustrated, angry, anxious, sad.

I tell myself I will try again tomorrow. 

I move things around on my calendar almost daily, even if it’s to remind myself to call a friend back who probably left me a message 3 days earlier. 

I promise myself I will do it tomorrow for sure. 

And then tomorrow comes and everything goes out the window once again and instead I end up reminding myself how worthless I am, how useless I am, how burdensome I am and how much better off everyone would be without me. 

Today there are no scenic  #summerofrich pictures of waterfalls or the beauty of nature to show off, instead today you are seeing a picture of me doing something else. 

Something else that brings me as much joy as going for a hike in nature or taking in the beauty of a waterfall. 

Something else that brings with it a sense of calm just like when I’m out exploring nature or taking in the beauty of a waterfall. 

But I didn’t do it alone, I couldn’t do it alone as much as I’ve tried to for many weeks now. It’s paralyzing. It’s as though my car is paralyzed too.

Over the last few years reading has become an important part of my self-care regime and call me old-school but I much prefer to go to a bookstore than order a book online. 

When I enter a bookstore I feel like the world around me is put on pause. I’m suddenly in a world of imagination and make believe. I can get completely lost in the moment as I slowly stroll up and down each aisle, sifting through the pages of someone else’s story.

It’s such a magical way to spend a “time-out”.

#timeout #reading #bookstores #mentalwellnes #mentalhealth #metime inthemoment #yourementalhealthmatters #youareenough #itsoktonotbeok

Time-Out cont’d

I’m in survival mode right now but I promised myself yesterday that I would treat this weekend as a “time-out” so today Rich and I went on a 3 hour #summerofrich “Fall Edition” adventure chasing several waterfalls, hiking up and down very rocky terrain, jumping through huge puddles, wading in creeks, walking along muddy trails and enjoying the beautiful landscape, change of seasons and the quiet and calm that surrounded us (except for maybe when we encountered 2 individuals who were wearing bright orange reflector vests and carrying a rifle).

We completed about 10 kms of the 28,000 km Trans Canada Trail which stretches from the Atlantic to the Pacific to the Artic Ocean. Only 27,990 km left to go!

We made it back to our car just as the skies opened up and drove part way from Bracebridge to home in torrential downpour but that didn’t stop us from making a pit stop at Webers to pick up dinner for tonight.

The rain eventually let up and we made it home just in time to shower the mud and sludge off and watch Martina Ortiz Luis (I’m obsessed) belt out our National Anthem to a stadium filled (well half filled) with loyal and very excited Leaf fans who have waited more than 18 months to see the puck drop at home. Go Leafs Go. Go Jays Go.

#mentalhealth #survivalmode #hiking #falledition #nature #beauty #timeout #chasingwaterfalls #fallisintheair #ontarioisourstodiscover #mentalwellness  #selfcare #webers #highfalls #bracebridge #transcanadatrail #thegreattrail #leafsnation #soulsearching

Last Official Weekend of #summerofrich 2021

Doing what I can today to focus on the beauty that surrounds me;

One moment at a time,

One step at a time,

One breath at a time. 

#lastofficialweekendofsummerofrich2021 #fallisalmosthere #changeofseasons #beautywithin #atacrossroad #ontarioisourstodiscover #niagaraescarpment #chasingwaterfalls #beamermemorialconservation #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #justbreath #suicideawareness #itsoktonotbeok  #imnotokay #youarenotalone #youareenough

Embracing the Brace

We took a rest today from any strenuous hiking after our grueling 3 hour hike yesterday where Rich injured his knee, most likely when he went tumbling down the side of a cliff.

His injury from the fall further intensified any pain and tenderness he’s endured in his one knee for like forever; I’m talking long before the #summerofrich ever began.

For years now he’s complained to me about muscle strain in his knee but no matter how much I’ve tried, has refused to speak with his doctor about it or at the very least try wearing a knee brace while hiking or doing any other strenuous activity.

But today he finally relented and took his knee brace for a test drive and a leisurely stroll with Maggie as well.

I’m not quite sure if I’ve ever told you this before, but Rich is the most stubborn person I know!! However, being stubborn isn’t always such a bad thing because stubborn people are often known to embody “strongly-felt” emotions and care more deeply for others; characteristics of Rich’s I wouldn’t change for the world.

Do you love a stubborn person???

#kneebrace #musclestrain #freefalling #stubbornness #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #Maggie #adogspurpose #exercise #physicalendurance #caresdeeply #selfcare

Monday Motivation: Badge of Honour

I started following a group on Facebook called “Ontario Hiking” soon after its conception last spring that has really helped me to find many new and exciting places to explore on our #summerofrich adventures.

It is run by Lauren Yakiwchuk who spends so much of her free time exploring our great Province and blogging about her personal experiences along her trails.

This group offers many fun and interactive experiences, great tips, lots of beautiful photos and so many helpful and honest reviews of places all over Ontario, some of which are very close to home for me and many more that are hundreds of kilometers away.

Throughout the last 4 years since the #summerofrich first launched (can you believe its been four years) I continue to add many new and adventurous places to my already very lengthy wishlist that I would love to explore one day.

It has become quite a long list and it just keeps on growing. 

Each week I now refer to this wonderful and very informative group of close to 80,000 like-minded members who share my passion for nature, hiking and mental wellness in order to plan our day trips. **I was really hoping that this summer we could take a 5 day hiking trip to the most northern tip of our beautiful Province for my birthday but unfortunately there have been too many obstacles standing in our way this year.

One of the group’s most fun and interactive experiences I’ve enjoyed following most since the group launched last spring has been reading posts from other members who have participated in the quarterly hiking challenges. 

These challenges occur every January, April, July and October. Participants are asked to complete 5 hikes (or walks) during that month. Once you have completed your hikes you can email the 5 locations you hiked during that month to a specific app in order to receive a “digital badge” for “bragging rights” and a chance to win prizes. 

I decided near the end of June that instead of just following other members participating in the upcoming July challenge that I would join in on the #julyhikingchallenge for myself. 

It’s not like we don’t hike several times a month anyways, especially during the summer and I knew that if I participated in the challenge for myself that it would push me (and Rich) on those days when one of us is just not up for it.

We both have such a feeling of accomplishment after our hikes and not only did we challenge each other in July to push through the 5 hikes, we surpassed the initial targeted goal and completed 7 of them instead. That for sure earned us both many bragging rights.

I just received my “digital badge” this morning via email for accomplishing the #julyhikingchallenge and although I may not have won any of the prizes this time around I feel like a baby bird today when they are first born and have no idea the power that their wings have or  how determined they will become in order to learn to fly; and one day maybe even learn to soar.

#mondaymotivation #badgeofhonour #hikingchallenge #ontariohiking  #ontariohikingchallenge #hikingtrails #summertimeselfcare #spiritualhealing #ontarioisourstodiscover #nature #mentalwellness #mentalhealth #babybird #learningtofly #depression #anxiety #suicideprevention #youareenough

A Magic Carpet Hike

Rich made a promise to me 26 (plus) years ago that he would take me on a magic carpet ride as we danced to our first song as husband and wife on our wedding day.

Today, on International Self-Care Day we hiked a section of the Oakridges Moraine called Jefferson Climb: Magic Carpet Ride, Upper Ridge Trail.

As we were hiking the trail I began to quietly sing the lyrics to our wedding song “A Whole New World” in my head (I wouldn’t dare sing out loud as we may have become prey to some dangerous wildlife species 🐻). 

As soon as we got back to our car (without getting lost this time) I played the song for Rich on my phone (there may have been some tears in the mix). 

This song had a great deal of meaning to the both of us when it came time for choosing our wedding song. After all, we started dating while working together in a video store, we both loved Disney movies and Aladdin had quickly become among one of our favourites that we’d watched many times together during our courtship (and we were also first in line to see the live action version when it was released to theaters a couple of years ago; hmmm when I think about it now that may have actually been the last movie we saw in a theater!). 

The song has become our anthem and as we hiked the “Magic Carpet Ride” trail today and as I quietly chanted the lyrics to myself and then replayed it for Rich on our car ride home I heard a whole new and even more meaningful version of the song this time. 

It may be a bit off key now but it will always be our song.

What was your wedding song?

What did you do to celebrate International Self-Care Day today?

A Whole New World:

#internationalselfcareday #magiccarpetride #awholenewworld #aladdin #disney #oursong #summerofrich #selfcare #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #hiking #nature #beinginthemoment #beauty #spiritualhealing #summerofrichadventures #lostinthemoment #youareenough

Alone In The Wild

I recently watched a movie called “WILD”, starring Reese Witherspoon (2014). 

It is based on a true story and the autobiography of Cheryl Strayed called “Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail”.

The movie takes place on the Pacific Crest Trail which spans 2,600 miles (that’s a shitload of kilometers!) in length and runs from the the Mexican/U.S border to the U.S/Canada border. To hike this grueling trail in its entirely would take someone between 5 to 6 months to complete. 

In June of 1995 this remarkable young woman (age 26) decides on a whim to take a much needed time out from her life and ascends on a journey toward self-discovery and healing by hiking 1,100 miles of the Pacific Crest Trail over a three month period.

At the start of her expedition, Cheryl had just recently divorced her husband and tragically lost her mother (she was only 45 years old when she died) but throughout the movie we also learn so much more about her traumatic childhood and reckless and destructive youth.

There were so many reasons why I wanted to watch this movie (which Rich discovered one night while channel surfing) and so many more reasons why while watching it I felt an instant connection to Cheryl even though our journeys are so vastly different. 

Of course the movie centered around hiking which was a very big draw for me but what led her on that path (trail) in the first place is what connected me so deeply. 

When I think of self-care it often includes alone time. Yes, being surrounded by other people is critical for our well-being but sometimes it can also create stress in your life as well (something I think many of us can relate to more than ever over the past year). 

Taking time to be with yourself is both vital and beneficial in order to tap into our own thoughts, feelings and experiences. 

Along Cheryl’s journey she met many interesting (and sometimes scary) people and was asked by one of them if she ever got lonely out there all alone but it was because of her time alone (and journaling) that she found the freedom to forge ahead and truly explore her own personal growth and development. 

It’s what gave her the strength and determination to discover the power of healing.

Although I love to hike and I find it especially therapeutic for me and although I quite often need space away from others in order to help me heal I don’t forsee a three month hiking expedition anytime soon in my future. 

For starters, I’d barely make it a mile before getting lost! Perhaps maybe a week alone at a spa would be a better place for me to start?

Where do you like to go when you need some alone time?

#wild #hiking #selfcare #selfdiscovery #therapeutic #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #pacificcresttrail #milesfromhome #writer #blogger #author #journey #beinthemoment #journaling #courage #healing #mindfulness #aloneinthewild @cherylstrayed @reesewitherspoon

Sleep Is A Bloody Nightmare

Yesterday I did an hour long aqua fit class in the morning and then went on a two hour long hike in the scorching heat later that afternoon. 

This sounds like the perfect recipe for a good night’s sleep, right? Well apparently not for someone like myself whose anxiety and depression really don’t give a flying fuck how exhausted you are. 

By dinnertime last night I could barely keep my eyes open but as soon as my head hit the pillow, that dream of getting a good night’s sleep once again turned into a nightmare, an anxiety infused nightmare. 

I have found myself tossing and turning more and more lately and I can’t seem to find a comfortable place to lay my head anymore which is probably because my brain and subconscious mind are too damn busy gearing itself up for its long night of torture ahead.

Sleep is meant to give both our bodies and minds time to recuperate from the stresses of the day but for the better part of seven years now sleep has been one of my biggest hurdles toward recovery. 

As the night progresses and the house becomes more and more quiet is usually when the noises in my head become the loudest and most heightened. 

My brain never shuts off, even when I do fall asleep. I can easily go from any state of sleep to waking suddenly by a trigger or a rush of adrenaline where feelings of impending doom kick in to high gear, leading to a full on panic attack about something that occurred earlier that day or that a loved one may be in danger, or worse. 

Sleep can be truly exhausting 😪

#sleepdeprivation #sleeplessnights #tossingandturning #nightterrors #nightmares #depression #anxiety #exhaustian #suicidalthoughts #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #mindfulness #impendingdoom #panicattacks #youareenough #youarenotalone #yourmentalhealthmatters

Unwrapping The Gift Of Family Time

My illness has made me feel so out of control too many times to count.

It’s a very scary feeling. 

I don’t fair well with chaos and disorder.

I need to cross every “t” and dot every “i” in everything I do. 

I make lists and I check them twice (well its probably closer to a dozen times).

When I feel like I’m losing control over a situation I become extremely overwhelmed.

I think much of my obsessive and compulsive behaviours when it comes to control stem from my childhood, a time when I never truly felt like I had any control over my own life, nor given free reign to make my own decisions or mistakes. 

This weekend was meant for my family and I to celebrate ME. 

They organized everything, leaving no stone unturned (or meal and snack unplanned either). 

However, leading up to the weekend my need to take control overwhelmed me. 

But this weekend was not meant for me to get overwhelmed. 

It was meant for me to sit back, relax, be in the moment and not get caught up in every little detail. 

The kids and Rich could see the  overwhelm surrounding me throughout the week.

I tried my darndest to remove myself from any of the chaos and disorder. 

They reassured me over and over again.

“Mom, don’t worry, we’ve got this!” was repeated on a daily basis.

And boy were they were right. 

They didn’t miss a beat.

No stone went left unturned.

Every “t” was crossed and every “i” dotted. 

Words cannot begin to describe how much this weekend truly meant to me or how truly appreciative and grateful I am for the love my family. 

They may not always “get” me and that’s OK because they “get” what truly matters.

Memories were made to last a lifetime this weekend, laughter was in abundance and I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect gift than the gift of quality time with my perfectly imperfect family.

#iloveyoutothemoonandback #wevegotthis #perfectlyimperfect #familymatters #familyfirst #youareenough #cottagelife #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #nature #hiking #kahshelake #lakeofhealingwaters #funinthesun #turningfifty #birthdaygetaway #agiftoftime #peaceful #therapeutic #campfire #smores #summerofrich #happyfathersday #selfcare #blessed

We Have Arrived

“The Gift of Family Time” has begun (See my original post a few weeks ago in case you missed it: The Gift of Family Time (https://youareenough712.wordpress.com/2021/05/26/the-gift-of-family-time/)

#thegiftoffamilytime #theperfectgift #birthdaygetaway #almostfifty #agiftoftime #familymatters #familyfirst #cottagelife #theweekend #therapeutic #selfcare #perspective #mindfulness #nature #inthemoment #youareenough #yourmentalhealthmatters #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #summerofrich #fathersdayweekend #iloveyoutothemoonandback

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