Does Everything Happen For A Reason?

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?  I have found myself pondering this question quite a lot, especially lately as I continue to battle many difficult setbacks in my life right now. Many of the setbacks I’ve been battling of late effect the wellbeing of my family too but many more of these setbacks have also led me to the brink of suicide for several weeks now.

According to the Greek Philosopher Aristotle everything does happen for a reason, always. He says that “Every
experience in your life is designed to shape you and help you grow into the highest and mightiest version of yourself.”

Sometimes though when you are in the throes of a particularly difficult or painful period in your life it can be really hard to understand its purpose or to find any positive meaning behind it. 

With the help of my wonderful therapist I have learned so much about myself in the last few years and I have gained a much better understanding of my past as well which has in turn given me the courage to let go of a lot of old wounds in order to heal.

I’ve been able to create an overall picture of myself in my head as I find the strength to let go of some of those wounds that have caused me great pain in my life and it is beginning to make perfect sense now. 

And over the last couple of years I have also been taught many valuable lessons amongst all the chaos and sadness through quiet introspection.  I have begun to accept that everything may very well happen for a reason but that it’s not always so easy to embrace it all of the time even though I know in my heart that it has been “designed to shape you and help you grow into the highest and mightiest version of yourself.”

So are you a believer?

#everythinghappensforareason #greekphilospher #aristotle #findingmypurpose #myjourney #youareenough #youarenotalone #itsoktonotbeok #endthestigmatogether #nationalsuicidepreventionawarenessmonth #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #mentalillness 

What’s Your Personality Type?

My cousin sent me this personality quiz and asked me to partake in it. I told her that I feel like I have two personalities; one being the person I was before I got sick and the latter being the person whom I have become since. So I decided I should take the test twice. I started off by taking the test as the person I feel I am today and then I went back and took the test again thinking about the person I used to be; the person whom I feel no longer exists.

The results of the first test showed my personality type as that of an Advocate. An Advocate, according to Webster’s dictionary is defined as “a person who pleads anothers cause, or who speaks or writes in support of something” and according to the test itself is also someone who is “quiet and mystical, yet very inspiring” which are all traits that I have aspired to become over the last many years so I’d say the test was pretty accurate thus far.

When I went back and did my second test I answered the questions while having to think back to what I felt best represented my personality 6+ years ago. It revealed that I had the personality type of an “Entertainer”. Some of the traits of an “Entertainer” (according to this test) would be described as someone who is “extroverted, feeling, engaging in life eagerly and very social.”

All of which were true once again and although I miss many parts of my personality that depression and anxiety have stolen from me, on the other hand I also know that it has allowed me to explore a side of me that would never have been possible otherwise.

What personality type are you?
https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

#personalitytest #perspective #beyou #youareenough #bekindtoyourself #personalitytraits #advocate #entertainer #endthestigmatogether #depression #anxiety #mentalillness #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #suicideprevention #nationalsuicidepreventionawarenessmonth

Socially Distanced Holiday Traditions

 

For many Jews around the world tomorrow night marks the start of the Jewish New Year (Rosh Hashana) which has traditionally been a time for celebrating with our family, friends and community but we all know that this year the holidays (much like Passover and Easter were in the Spring) are going to look and feel a whole lot different which can and will likely cause many people to feel the “holiday blues”.

I mean who can really blame anyone by this point for feeling “blue” (regardless of your religious beliefs or faith), seeing as it’s now been more than 6 months since we have been able to “traditionally” celebrate squat with our family, friends and community. 

Over the last many years, holiday gatherings and celebrations of any kind have been incredibly difficult for me and whether it’s the social pressures, the obligations or the expectations that come along with it, together they all just seem to exacerbate these feelings further.

Depression brings with it a high level of discomfort that is truly unexplainable to many who have never experienced it before. This is also where having a severe anxiety disorder comes into play and when you mix the two together it can make life feel pretty lethal sometimes. 

We will still be celebrating the holidays this year just with a lot less social pressures, a lot less obligations and a lot less expectations than usual and for me this is somewhat of a relief which I know may sound selfish to some. 

We will bring in the New Year as always and still with many of our same traditions as always but just at a more socially Covid accepted distance but still just as meaningful and sweet.

Wishing everyone celebrating (however that may be) a very happy, safe and healthy New Year.

#happynewyear #roshhashana #backyardcelebrations #traditions #socialdistancing #togetherapart #youareenough #mentalillness #mentalhealth #checkonyourlovedones #healthyboundaries #mentalwellness #holidayblues #shanatova

Our New Norm

Jacob called in sick to work the other day, something he has rarely done in the past but he just wasn’t feeling well. He told us he was feeling really run down, he had a case of laryngitis and he also displayed some other mild cold-like symptoms as well. If this had been 6 months ago we would have probably just given him some Tylenol or Cold and Flu medicine and sent him and his “man cold” back to bed but instead we sent him to go get a Covid test to put all of our minds at ease.

We can no longer just simply dismiss exhaustion or other cold and flu-like symptoms as nothing more than the “common cold”. For almost 24 hours we kept him isolated to his room in the basement while awaiting his results. We left food and water for him outside his bedroom door like you would that of a prisoner (and Hannah made him a big bowl of ice cream for dessert too) and we lay in wait with a feeling of panic until he got his results.

While we waited we also needed to discuss in great length what the possibility of a positive test would mean for the five of us and for anyone else Jacob had been in contact with over the last week or so.

It felt scary and very real. His test results THANKFULLY came back negative, but as we head into the cooler weather now and with the cold and flu season upon us, this is going to become the reality for more and more of us in the coming months and from the several stories I have seen on Social Media just one day into the start of the new school year for many of our children who were being sent home due to having runny noses, our “new norm” is certain to only add to an already very long and uncertain Fall and Winter season ahead.

#staysafeeveryone  #bettersafethansorry #covid19test #wearamask #washyourhands #socialdistancing #togetherapart #youareenough

A Purposeful #Summerofrich

The “Summer of Rich” began a few years ago as nothing more than a silly declaration from Rich one early morning at the end of June as he waved goodbye to the kids (with tears of joy in his eyes) as they boarded a bus for the entire summer away at camp. 

For Rich that moment meant he now had 7 glorious weeks ahead of him to catch his breath and push the reset button because as I have mentioned many times before that for the last 6 years he has had to take on both the roles of Mom and Dad, along with that of chef, maid, chauffeur, Psychologist, designated Schlepper and countless others too.

But this past May right after we found out the girls (Jacob now works full-time as an Electrician) would not be going away to camp this summer due to Covid-19 I wrote a blog titled “Should The #Summerofrich Be Cancelled Too?” (May 27, 2020) and what it meant for the #summerofrich this year. 

Since its conception a few years back, the “Summer of Rich” has evolved in many different ways; it’s even got its own hashtag which often gets special shout-outs by its many “adoring fans” who seem to genuinely enjoy following our adventures; so how could we disappoint them?

I may have needed to make several amendments to our itinerary this summer and we definitely had to adapt to many other changes because of Covid-19 and having the kids home all summer which also meant that there was much less of an opportunity for Rich to have some well deserved time to breathe or a push of the reset button but through the many amendments and other changes this summer I truly believe that in many ways, the #summerofrich may have actually evolved into something much deeper and with an even more meaningful purpose.

#summerofrichcoronaedition #labourdayweekend #itsstillsummer #youareenough #nature #hiking #therapeutic #selfcare #mentalwellness #mentalhealth #depression #anxiety #nationalsuicidepreventionawarenessmonth #silverlinings #iloveyoutothemoonandback #silvercreekconservation #brucetrail

Going On A Bear Hunt

Today’s #summerofrich adventure was quite the adventure.  We headed to a trail near Port Perry and when we got there it was closed (the website gave no indication that it was closed), so we went to another trail a bit further away; and guess what? it was closed too! (Again no mention of it on their website; but it was under construction).

By this point we figured since we had come all that way we might as well venture to yet one more trail (I mean what are the chances it would be closed too!). Thankfully it was not; Yahoo!!! As we reached the start of the trail we saw a sign that read (in pics) “beware of bears”! Ya well who doesn’t like to be a bit “risque” sometimes so off we went into the forest, but with every step we took we started to get more and more nervous (well Rich did lol) which was only about 5 minutes into our hike.

There were no other hikers in sight (maybe they had already been eaten by a bear) and we tried hard to ignore every rustling sound coming from the woods but THEN we came upon piles and piles of bear poop (Don’t worry I saved you from any pics!). So it was at that very moment that we hightailed it out of there and back to safety!

It looks like a hike just wasn’t in the cards for us today (good thing I did an aqua fit class this morning) and instead we headed to Port Perry’s Main Street and walked along the Pier and did some window shopping instead (that’s pretty mindful in my opinion, wouldn’t you agree?) which is where our adventure continued.

Once we had enough window shopping we decided to grab a quick bite to eat on a patio close to the water which was also our first time doing so since patios opened back up. We placed our order and THEN came the lightening, the thunder and soon followed by a terrestrial downpour!

Luckily the umbrella over the picnic table kept us pretty dry for most of the time (and it was too late to make it back to the car anyways), but then the wind turned directions and we were getting soaked! 

You can’t fault us for trying today, it was certainly a memorable day and nothing a big scoop of peanut butter and chocolate ice cream from one of the local shops couldn’t fix.

#summerofrichcoronaedition #nohikingtoday #bewareofbears #imisspatios #portperry #scugogtownship #icecreamyouscream #peanutbutterandchocolateicecream #thunderandlightening #youareenough #mentalhealth #mentalwellness

It’s 11:11

Monday Motivation

It’s 11:11. Time to make your wishes come true! We all make wishes subconsciously throughout our day, probably numerous times per day, that which we hope to fulfill.

Many of these wishes are just a fleeting moment in time like when you find yourself wishing it would stop raining outside or maybe you wish you could take a vacation.

Then there are the wishes that are done with more of a conscious mind like when we wish we we could find a way to have more money or wish we could somehow find a way to better our health or then there is the wish of so many who are longing (and wishing) to find that one true love to share their life with.

In order for our wishes to come true, they need to become more than just idle thoughts. They take vision, they take a mental image, they take intent, they take direction and they need to be written down and read out loud many times a day.

Wishes can and do come true, so tell me one thing that you wish for right now? 

#makeithappen #mondaymotivation #whatdoyouwishfor #makeawishescometrue #makeawish #thepowerofwishes #writeyourwishesdown #saythemoutloud #eleveneleven #youareenough #bekindtoyourself #dreamer #desire

Getting Caught In The Rain

I went for a walk this afternoon with Rich. When we left the house the sun was shining brightly in our faces through a few white clouds but as we kept walking further and further away from our home we stopped for a moment and looked up at the sky behind us which had suddenly become very, very dark.

We knew that it was only a matter of time before we would be heading straight into the oncoming storm as we tried making our way back home. As Rich picked up his pace in order to try and beat the storm I shouted to him (half jokingly) from up ahead, words which I have heard echoed to me many many times before throughout my journey: “We can’t look back, we can only look forward.”

When we get stuck looking back on our past we can often begin to second guess ourselves and the decisions we make, easily filling our minds with regret and dread; something that my own depressive mind continues to do on a very regular basis.

It was too late by this point in our walk to do anything but look forward anyways (and get home quick). Looking forward helps us create silver linings (and if we are lucky maybe even a rainbow) and it also encourages us to live in the moment which once again is so much of what I need to work on for myself. (Oh and in case you were wondering, we  made it home just in the nick of time!)

#onedayatatime  #youareenough #stormyweather #oncomingstorm #rainbows #silverlinings #cloudydays #dontlookback #lookingforward #mentalhealth #depression  #anxiety #mentalwellness #caughtintherain

Why Bother?

It’s hard to believe that we are already 6 months in to 2020 (time sure does fly when you’re having fun!) For most of you reading this you are probably thinking, fun? What fun? Ya, ya I know, it has not been much fun at all to say the very least and over the last few days I’ve spent a great amount of time reflecting on the first half of the year (see blog yesterday: A Labour of Love) and now I am trying to figure out what my life looks like moving into the second half of the year or which direction I will go.

I have learned a lot (an awful lot) about myself, others and life in general since the New Year began and so many days in the past 6 months I have found myself going to bed thinking “Why Bother?” And as I continue to figure my journey toward personal growth I will somehow find the direction I need to go.

What direction do you want to go from here? What have you learned so far in 2020?

Please continue to follow my journey at: https://youareenough712.wordpress.com

#whybother #youareenough #youarenotalone #itsoktonotbeok #twentytwentyvision #personalgrowth #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #depression  #anxiety #masksoff #suicide #wheredidmommyssmilego #amazondotca

Can We Just Agree To Disagree?


The Coronavirus has brought out a whole batshit crazy amount of fear and anger in people all around the world and the amount of judgment and hate I’ve seen and heard (especially on social media) has been fricken shocking and jaw dropping at times to say the very least. 

It’s been a very long (almost) 3 months for all of us and is still filled with so much uncertainty which can understandably make it that much more scary. It’s basically all anyone ever talks about and it often feels like we are all centerstage at a worldwide Political debate taking on our fiercest opponent. 

The Pandemic has drawn many lines in the sand and now as the parameters of the lockdown/quarantine begin to ease, it may be time for all of us to just agree to disagree. 

Let’s try and show kindness to one another as we figure out what is best for ourselves and our loved ones right now. Let’s do so without instilling fear or passing judgment on to each other because we all have our own stories and our own unique circumstances and we all have our own reasons why; and that is perfectly okay, in fact it’s more than ok.

Don’t let others pressure you to do something your not comfortable with or quite ready for yet, but in return, please show kindness and respect to those that are more comfortable or ready. You are not walking in anyone else’s shoes but your own.

Even the strongest people you know have in someway been mentally impacted by this crisis and no matter what our story is, our circumstances are or our reasons why, we have all been forever changed by what has happened to us, but the one thing that can never change and the one thing that can be the difference for so many of us right now is if we all remember to just be kind.

#bekind #kindness #kindnessmatters #mentalwellness #mentalhealth #wereallinthistogether #strongertogether #agreetodisagree #fear #anger #judgmentfreezone #weallhaveourownreasonswhy #youareenough #choosekindness #covid19 #coronavirus #pandemic #overwhelm #vulnerability