If you’re feeling lonely, vulnerable, isolated, anxious or afraid (or maybe all of them) right now then take a step outside for a moment and look up at the sky above you (wherever you are day or night) and know that no matter where you are in the world that we all share the same beautiful sky. So reach your hands up in the air as high up as you can, close your eyes, take a deep breath and imagine for a moment the whole world united by that same beautiful sky.
The term “Social Distancing” seems kind of ironic given the technological era that we live in which makes it nearly impossible to distance ourselves socially. Technology today allows us to not only never have to step outside of our homes again but it also allows us to still be the very social beings that humans instinctively are. Always having access to email, text messaging, Social Media platforms or being able to Facetime someone on the other side of the world any time of day gives us the opportunity to always stay social and can also allow us to stay connected to one another. Oh and the best part is that we never have to feel like we are missing out on each other’s lives.
Because right now we are physically missing out on each other’s lives more than ever and being able to stay socially connected during a time of “Social Distancing” makes everything feel a little less scary. Would you agree?
Yesterday was a difficult day for many and I know that there was alot to take in and that new information was being thrown at us from every news source; pretty much on an hourly basis. So it’s perfectly understandable that our level of anxiety may be higher than normal today. This is all very unprecedented territory and still very much unknown. I have compiled a list (through several Mental Health Experts) of some ways for us to cope with this type of anxiety.
1.Take a break from the news or limit the amount of time you spend watching it, and try to filter it out online. Also please remember that half of what is being shared on Social Media is not always the truth. 2. Talk to someone (or text) about how you are feeling. Sorting out your emotions and feeling supported by loved ones is so helpful. Keeping your feelings bottled up will only cause you to spiral further. 3. Try to be present in the moment. If you are feeling anxious about catching the virus just let yourself know that right now there is no immediate threat to you and use lots of positive affirmations to remind yourself that you are safe. 4. Start journaling and writing down your thoughts and feelings of gratitude.
It’s ok to feel anxious or angry, or have difficulty sleeping or concentrating but the best thing we can all do right now is to keep washing our hands and following all the required steps to try and stay healthy for ourselves and our loved ones and remember that not every cough and sneeze means someone has Corona!
It’s no secret that I love all things Disney. Growing up I owned so much Disney apparel and accessories and I especially loved my gigantic Mickey Mouse phone that I spent hours and hours talking on (yes it would be an antique by today’s standard). I loved drawing Disney characters and I even hand made my own Monster’s Inc t-shirts as lootbags for Jacob’s 4th birthday party which was his latest obsession at the time. I made sure my kids fell in love with Disney movies and still to this day, I would choose a Disney theme park or Disney cruise over an all inclusive anyday (maybe in Paris next time though) and Disney was even a common theme at our wedding from our first dance to Aladdin’s hit song “A Whole New World” to the ceramic Mickey and Minnie Mouse bride and groom that donned the top of our wedding cake (which has since smashed to pieces and if I were in any way superstitious I’d be second guessing how we are less than 3 months away from celebrating our 25th anniversary).
Yes I have always had a bit of an obsession with all things Disney throughout my lifetime and although it’s a lot more subtle these days, it’s always something I try to incorporate into my life still, including the fact that the only collection of movies I still own in VHS tapes are Disney ones. I also love doing Disney themed puzzles whenever I can and my recent completion of Beauty and the Beast is one of my favorites because well, Beauty and the Beast is one of my all time favorite Disney movies.
Disney has a magical way of teaching us so many valuable life lessons and I think the reason I love Beauty and the Beast so much is because of those valuable life lessons; lessons that are not only important to teach our children but most adults could benefit from a refresher course in as well. Beauty and the Beast teaches us about the power of love and kindness and the importance of inner beauty. Many of us often need to be reminded that beauty is not about having a pretty face but that true beauty, the kind of beauty that teaches us about the power of love and kindness, comes from inside.
What makes this movie stand out above most other Disney movies and one of the many reasons I love it so much is how it portrays women as strong and ambitious. It shows young girls that it’s okay to have dreams and desires and that it’s also more than okay to be different.
This timeless classic allows each and every one of us to embrace our imperfections and reminds us (as cliche as it sounds) to never judge a book by its cover. I see so much of me in Belle; from feeling hopeless and judged and sad and alone to letting the world see her compassionate heart, to finding the ability to be true to herself and for of course finding her prince charming! I think I may have to a have a VHS and chill day this weekend! Who wants to bring the popcorn and VCR???
Last week was a pretty damn crappy one. I experienced some of the most difficult and trying days for me and without so much of the incredible support in my life I wouldn’t have made it through. I was reminded the other day of a blog I wrote over 3 years ago called “Make Your Bed”. It is one of the very first blogs I ever wrote and to this day is still one of my favorites. I thought since many of you probably didn’t see it the first time around and even if you did originally read it, we could all still use some good ole fashioned motivation before we start the new week ahead. I also highly recommend you watch the video too; it actually inspired my kids to start making their beds every morning!
Recently I watched a commencement speech given by Admiral William H. McRaven, a retired U.S Navy Seal, in 2014 to the graduating class at the University of Texas. I was so intrigued listening to his speech which recounted 10 lessons he learned from his 6 months of grueling, demanding, tiring and debilitating Navy Seal training. These 10 lessons not only apply to life as a Navy Seal, but it equally applies to the challenges that each and every one of us endure as human beings living in an uncertain world.
After giving his speech in 2014, which went viral, Admiral William H. McRaven decided that he still had so much more to share with the world from his 37 year career as a U.S Navy Seal (which included the capturing of Saddam Hussein). He felt a responsibility to expand on how those 10 simple lessons helped shape his life and did so by publishing a book a few months ago titled “Make Your Bed”. It is a small but extremely powerful, compassionate and optimistic book that I was able to read with ease. It is subtitled “Little Things That Can Change Your Life…And Maybe The World”. That for me was what caught my eye as I am always looking for inspirational and relevant words that pertain to my life.
Each of the 10 chapters recounts stories of perseverance, suffering, determination, courage and humbleness. Even through all of the hardships he endured, he still finds a way to motivate and captivate his readers with his knowledge and experience. He reminds us that life is not meant to be attempted alone, that we all need a strong team behind us, cheering us on and picking up the slack when times get tough. He teaches us the importance of respect and to never ever caste judgement on others. He conveys to us that life is not always fair and that sometimes bad things do happen to good people. He proves to us that failure IS an option and it will only help build character and strength. He shows us that we all must take risks in order to get through the toughest obstacles that may be standing in our way. He tells us to never back down from our fears, that it is better to face them straight on in order to find the courage to move forward. He emphasizes that no matter what darkness may be thrown our way at some point in our lives, and it will, make sure to find the hopefulness and power within us to never ever give up.
The title “Make Your Bed” which is in turn, the first chapter of the book is also the foundation for which all the other chapters are built on. How many times as a child did your parents tell you to make your bed, and how many times as a parent yourself have you mimicked those words to your own children. My kids can attest to this as I am constantly bugging them to complete this task, but I am continually let down in my efforts.
The Admiral drills into his reader’s heads how important it is to accomplish this task, no matter how small or senseless it may seem to many it can actually change the way you approach your day. He believes that if you want to change your life or conquer the world, it starts by completing this task first thing every morning, igniting a positive tone for what challenges may be thrown your way that day. It helps lay to rest the struggles you may have encountered the day before, giving you fresh opportunities to face another day productively and ensure you complete many more tasks throughout your day. As silly as it may seem, developing this good habit can also help reduce your stress level and de-clutter your mind, as when you walk into your room with a well made bed the aura of cleanliness will always make you smile and not to mention the satisfaction you feel when you get back into your tidy bed at the end of the day. Lastly, by completing this simple task at the start of every day can help to reinforce the importance that its the little things in life that truly matter and who in this world doesn’t need a healthy dose of that. I for one do, and from now on, the start of every day (whatever time that may be), I will be completing this task, maybe with hospital corners and all…and maybe just maybe, it will inspire my kids to follow…ya right, who am I kidding?
*I encourage everyone to watch Admiral William H. McRaven’s commencement speech on YouTube…or read his book!*
I hope you can tell from the picture (it’s a glass frame so you may have to zoom in to get the full effect) that the central focus inside the frame is a semicolon with positive affirmations encompassing it. The semicolon has been a huge part of my story for several years now and I have shown my support to the Project Semicolon Movement for close to 4 years now. For those of you who don’t know, Project Semicolon is a “nonprofit organization known for its advocacy of mental health wellness and its focus as an anti-suicide initiative. Founded in 2013, the movement’s aim is presenting hope and love to those who are struggling with depression,suicide, addiction, and self-injury. They are known for encouraging people to tattoo the punctuation mark semicolon (;) as a form of solidarity between people dealing with mental illness or the death of someone from suicide”, which is what I did in July 2016 (see photo).
I’ve been struggling a lot over the past week and I figured I could use some inspiration today so I made it a “crafty” kind of day. It’s ok to not be ok, it’s ok to talk about the hard days and it’s more than ok to tell someone you’re struggling because we all deserve to feel hope, we all deserve to feel worthy and we all deserve to feel like our story isn’t over yet;
My tattoo on my left shoulder
You see, a semicolon is not just any ole punctuation mark that an author would use to end a sentence, it instead indicates a brief pause, and for me that brief pause is a symbol of my life and the need to catch my breath in order to continue the rest of my story. We are all authors to our own stories and it’s ok if you need to take a pause between sentences.
Every year on January 19 since I first posted this photo in 2015, along with a short message, it pops up as a memory on my Facebook wall. The first couple of years it would pop up I found it to be somewhat emotional for me to even look at and have to revisit the memory of a time I’d sooner forget, but now I know that this memory signifies much more than just about the first time I was discharged from a hospital stay where I had just spent over 3 months in psychiatric care. I know now that it is a piece of my journey and a special reminder of what living with a mental illness has taught me about life since then.
This photo reminds me that I need to keep living with my mental illness with authenticity because being honest with your loved ones or not worrying about feeling judged by others will help diminish your pain knowing just how many people are truly in your corner.
This photo reminds me what the meaning of real friendship is. Knowing there is always someone there for you ready to make you laugh or ready to wipe away your tears, without judgment.
This photo also reminds me that it’s okay to not be okay and that reaching out for help is more than okay when you need to. And that asking for help shows so much strength and courage.
This photo reminds me of the importance of kindness and how a kind action or a kind word can and will change the course of someone else’s day and a kind action or a kind word can and will impact the course of someone’s life as well.
I’ve had to take several steps back during the last few weeks of 2019 to try and figure out what I need most right now in my life in order to help me move forward into 2020. It’s been a very difficult year for both myself and my family but at the same time I certainly can’t nor won’t forget my proudest accomplishments and all the good things that have happened for me as well.
This past year has taught me so much about myself and as I enter into the new year (and decade) today and try to regain some of those baby steps forward I know that I first need to learn how to crawl before I can learn to walk or run; an important lesson we could all learn from. We may also need to be reminded as the new year begins that we should try and set small and attainable goals; not resolutions, that we need to inspire one another, that we need to lift each other up, that we need to create healthy boundaries, that we need to be kinder to each other, that we need to judge less and forgive ourselves and others more, that we need to make self-care our number one priority, that we are not alone, that we can do anything; not everything and last but certainly not least we need to never forget that YOU ARE ENOUGH!
It’s crazy to think about it but we are not only about to enter a whole new year but an entire new decade as well. It’s kinda difficult right now for me to reflect back on the last decade with joy in my heart because for more than half of the last ten years I have spent it trying to survive and well truth be told, trying to die.
I do know though that somewhere buried beneath my illness that my heart has felt a lot of pride and joy throughout the last decade from so many amazing highlights and milestones. In the past ten years we added a new addition to our family and Maggie has since filled our family with so much joy for close to nine years now. In the past ten years I’ve gotten to witness both Elementary and High School graduations galore (with one more to go in the new year!) and I have also watched all three of my children transition from pre-teens to teens and now into young adulthood as well. In the past ten years I got to plan and execute one of the greatest days of our lives with the celebration and milestone of Jacob and Hannah’s B’nai Mitzvah; a night which we were so blessed to be surrounded by so many of our loved ones. In the past ten years we have also acknowledged and celebrated many more milestone birthdays as well including the most incredible family vacation in honour of Rachel’s 13th birthday. And I will never forget nearly ten years ago being able to experience the look on my kid’s faces when we walked through the gates of Disney World all together as a family!
Those are only a handful of the incredible highlights and milestones from the last ten years and there have been countless more but as I mentioned above it’s kinda difficult for me to feel the joy in my heart through the shattered glass of my illness when more than half of this current decade has been spent just trying to get through each day; basically I live each day in survival mode where the end goal is trying to avoid having a bad day.
I never want to erase the incredible memories I’ve made during the last ten years and I certainly never want to forget the many successes either so as I enter into the next year and decade I will take with me what I have learned over this past year in order to make room for joy in my heart. I have learned so much about myself this past year alone and one of my greatest successes this year was being able to accept that if some days all I can do is survive, then that’s one step closer to joy. We all deserve to feel joy in our hearts and maybe I needed this past decade to teach me how.
Wishing you all good health, joy and much success for 2020!
YouAreEnough 
You must be logged in to post a comment.