I had a real shitty week. It all started last Saturday, and I continued to spiral from there. It included yet another diagnosis to add to my growing list of issues I already contend with daily, which was immediately followed up with a biopsy. Yesterday afternoon, though, I received some positive news (not my biopsy results, that’s not happening for a few weeks). But the news I received, maybe for a brief moment, allowed me to wash away the stress and despair I have felt all week long. It allowed me to see the kinder, gentler side of life. And of myself.
I made a promise to myself when I received the positive news via an email late yesterday afternoon, on “love” day and just hours before the start of the “Family Day” long weekend (here in Canada, or most of Canada that is) to hold onto this feeling. It made me believe that I am worthy and good enough.
Self-love can be very powerful and can help set standards for how we want to be treated in all our relationships both with ourselves and others. People who truly love themselves first will, in turn, benefit from the happiest, most valuable relationship of all.
Of course, this is not me. This is the most opposite of me as you can get. I shame myself daily, I put myself down daily, and I berate myself daily to the point that I have left many bruises and scars on my body and in my heart.
If you were to ask me to name all the things that I love in my life, my list could be endless. Top 3, of course, are my husband, my kids, and my dog Maggie, but I could still go on and on naming more and more things that I love from there. Unfortunately though, you can be rest assured that upon conclusion of my list I will not have named one very important love; myself, no matter how many times a day I try to crush my inner voice and tell it to stop shaming me, putting me down and berating me.
Trust me it’s something I work on daily trying to shut those damn voices up any way I can. My heart does know the importance of learning to love and accept myself and to try and see all the reasons why so many others love me too.
Today, I am embracing those reasons why. Written in plain sight, right there on my shirt. In one big heart, gently pressing against my own heart. Everything I stand for. Reminding me that I am worthy. That I am good enough. Giving me plenty of reasons to love myself wholeheartedly.
#selflove #plainsight #love #family #mentalhealth #wellbeing #treatmentresistantdepression #anxiety #relationships #loveyourself #longweekend #iamworthy #iamenough #positivevibes
YouAreEnough 