MONDAY MOTIVATION; PERHAPS SOME DAYS I AM STRONGER THAN I THINK 

I spent the better part of my weekend curled up in a ball, blanket pulled over my head, sobbing. 


My heart raced non stop, my stomach was in knots. 


I was consumed by fear.


My nervous system was in constant fight or flight mode. 


I was overwhelmed.


I couldn’t breathe. 


I felt like a failure. 


The voices in my head had me overthinking everything I’d said or should’ve said or done the week before and then worrying about what my future holds.


I was crippled with anxiety which quickly turned to panic; many times over. 


I was not okay.


Friends and loved ones helped distract me, listened to me and reassured me that I am worthy, that I am good enough.


My emotional need to try and please everyone took hold of me so tight this weekend, I was barely functioning.


I told myself I wasn’t strong enough. 


My desire to please everyone else came at the expense of my own mental health and wellbeing.


I’d lost total control and wasn’t sure I’d make it through the weekend, let alone get to work today.


But something or maybe it was someone, gave me the inner strength I needed this afternoon to stand up to the bully in my head and allowed me the courage to take back my power in order to navigate through some very murky waters and change the course of a very difficult situation. 


I faced my self-doubt today and I faced my fears head on.


I felt empowered.


Today I learned that perhaps some days I am stronger than I think.


#agentlereminder #youarestrongerthanyouthink #mondaymotivation #youareenough #empowered #anxiety #depression #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #selfdoubt #fightorflight #panicattacks #itsoktonotbeok #peoplepleaser #trustingod 

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Author: Kim Fluxgold

Wife, mom of 3 beautiful children, dog lover, creative sole and children's book Author. Sharing my journey with depression and anxiety through blogging in hopes of educating and ending the stigma.

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