With Valentine’s Day just around the corner I thought it’d be the perfect time to explore our “Love Language” (it can apply to non-romantic relationships as well).
According to Dr. Gary Chapman who developed the concept of “Love Languages”, each of us express and receive love in different ways.
There are five types of Love Languages (LL) in all.
Words of Affirmation: In this LL, people value verbal acknowledgements of affection most often. Hearing the words “I love you” frequently spoken, being offered regular compliments, verbal encouragement, words of appreciation, text messages or conversation on social media will fill this individual’s love tank best.
Quality Time: An individual whose LL is “Quality Time” feels most adored when they are spending time just hanging out with someone special so long as their attention is directly on them and they are made to feel as though they are the priority. This may include having regular eye contact, actively listening, engaging in meaningful conversations and being “present” in the moment.
Receiving Gifts: This one is pretty straightforward however it’s not about the price tag attached to the gift but instead it’s about what the gift symbolizes, its emotional attachment and the effort that was put into finding that perfect gift which has both meaning to them and reflects upon their values.
Acts of Service: When someone’s LL is this, a person feels most valued when their partner or loved one goes out of their way to show them how appreciated they are by performing random acts of kindness for them and trying to make their life easier. This may include doing the dishes after supper, taking out the trash without being told or making you a cup of coffee in the morning. Their motto is always “actions speak louder than words!”
Physical Touch: Physical touch and intimacy is very important to a person whose LL falls into this category. Touch in many different forms can be very powerful and create an even deeper emotional connection with their partner. They place great value on the warmth and comfort that comes from a hug, a kiss or a cuddle on the couch.
Once you figure out which “Love Language” you most relate to make sure to share it with others and vice versa. Having an open and honest dialogue about your needs and wants can definitely help strengthen some relationships and bring about deeper connections with your loved ones and it may even avoid you having a box of heart shaped chocolates thrown at your head next time 😁.
Which “Love Language” (LL) are you?
*To learn more about our love languages check out the book “The Five Love Languages”, by Gary Chapman*
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